Monday, 16 July 2012

A conversation I wish I'd never started: No 6

Regular readers will know this feature on my blog usually involves my inability to finish sentences or think of people's names when talking with my teenage son. In a recent twist, I also had a ridiculous conversation with my husband about Radio 2 DJs. However it is unusual for both parties in the discussion to suffer from the same affliction.

Without further ado, I give you the 'Conversation I wish I'd never started' starring my mother.

Mum: Have you seen that annoying advert on the telly with the mother of that presenter?
Me: Which presenter?
Mum: Good-looking bloke.  Married to the woman who does Dancing on Ice.
Me: Holly Willoughby? I didn't know her husband was a presenter? Are you not thinking of the bloke she does that morning programme with?
Mum: Oh, what's his name again? Paul something?
Me: Oh I can see him...grey hair, little chap.
Mum: Philip..
Me: Philip....Philip Schofield?
Mum: Yes, but it's not him. He's tall with a Yorkshire accent.
Me: Oh I know who you mean. What's he called? Vernon!
Mum: Vernon Kay!Yes, that's him.
Me: He's not married to Holly Willoughby.
Mum: Well he's married to that blonde woman who does the dancing on ice.
Me: No, he's married to the blonde woman who does Strictly Come Dancing.
Mum: What's her name then?
Me: Oh god, what is it now?

Rory (shouting through from the living room) : For god's sake! Tess Daly! Married to Vernon Kay. And he's not from Yorkshire, he's from Bolton, Lancashire.

Me: So what's the advert for?
Mum: No idea, but I can't stand it anyway.


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28 comments:

  1. Haha! That sounds sooo familiar! One step closer to us turning into our mothers !

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    1. I have definitely turned into mine. I make conversation with checkout assistants. I used to be embarrassed when she did that and now I enjoy the chat!

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  2. I don't forget names - I just give people the wrong names regardless. I know their names, but just say the wrong one aloud.
    This runs in my family - I'm well on the way...

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  3. This is a sitcom script. Pure and simple. You need to keep a tape recorder with you at all times.

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    1. Fancy writing it with me, like Perry and Croft - all the best comedy script writers seem to work in pairs?

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  4. Well at least you don't get told off for not knowing what your mother is thinking. LOL

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    1. You're right- we were totally in synch! Hopeless but at least together in our ignorance.

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  5. Mr. Pedantic here! Didn't your mother start this conversation?

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    1. Bugger. I was waiting for someone to spot that. Should have put money on it being you, Troy :-)

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  6. Brilliant! Been trawling on twitter & got cross. This has cheered me! Thank you!

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    1. My pleasure. Glad to have put a smile on your face!

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  7. Love it! Made me laugh out loud, to husband's confusion! What a great idea for a post - as they say, the best ideas are always the simplest ones. I will think of this when trying not to lose my rag with my mum, as I' m about to spend 6 weeks in her house!!

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    1. Six weeks! Deep breaths and count to ten...

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  8. I knew exactly who she meant immediately..I hate that ad too!! and my daughter keeps telling me I am turning in to Grandma...I have no control..it just happens!

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    1. Mum will be pleased you don't like the ad: that will make the whole sorry conversation worthwhile. And yes, the metamorphosis is inevitable I suppose.

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  9. That had me laughing too, but by the time I got to near the end I'd forgotten what the original question was!

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    1. Ha! Yes, I think some time probably elapsed before I remembered to ask about the advert itself.

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  10. Brilliantly painful. Thanks for sharing and giving me a laugh this morning :)

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  11. Replies
    1. I know, pitiful isn't it, though I have to say usually my mother's memory is impeccable: she's like an elephant. Must have been my influence!

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  12. Oh dear, your brain sounds as addled as mine. It is a very annoying advert though.

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    1. So you know the one she means? I can't remember it, or what it's for. Maybe have to google it.

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  13. My mother and I both have annoying habits also of picking up a conversation we had a half hour ago without warning, so you all would sound like sane-house compared to us!

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    1. Ha! Shows you are in tune with each other. Confusing for everyone else though!

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  14. And now we know where you get it from ;)

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